Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
