it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Sober January is a disaster.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
