You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
love makes seman taste better
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
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