Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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