well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
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