it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
We had sex on a dog bed..
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize
