I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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