So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
