so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
