Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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