how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize