Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
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