I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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