It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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