When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
