Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
