just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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