So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
