You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
