How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
