..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
