i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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