Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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