After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
