OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
