I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize