Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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