Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
