Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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