So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
