her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Even my vagina gasped.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
