she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
