i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
