just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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