Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
