How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
