dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Randomize
