There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
