You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
