You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Did I show you my penis last night?
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize