I just cut my nipple shaving
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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