would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
