Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
