If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
