I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
