"it" just moved
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
