you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
