the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
