I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Mom said you looked used
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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