it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Holy shit dude........stairs
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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