i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Randomize
